Peace

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace; Where there is hatred, let me sow love; Where there is injury, pardon; Where there is doubt, faith; Where there is despair, hope; Where there is darkness, light; Where there is sadness, joy. --Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi

I recently heard an Irishman comment that finally Americans know what it’s like to live in fear all the time. As those words echoed through my mind, I wondered if fear would ever subside for many of us. It’s no wonder with all the news we’ve been barraged with since September 11 news about the threat of additional terrorist attacks, anthrax, and anti-American protests around the globe. And Osama bin Laden has promised that it will not stop until we meet his criteria. During these times of uncertainty, it’s easy to give in to fear. I found myself wondering what the opposite of fear was. For me it is represented by being at peace -- the kind of peace that is not based on circumstances, but rather on independent will and choosing where I focus my thoughts. CBS news anchor Dan Rather recently stated that "America's greatest threat is not anthrax, it's panic." I agree with him. If we allow fear to dominate our thoughts, eventually panic will set in and then the terrorists will have accomplished their goal. If the terrorists are able to penetrate us with enough psychological warfare, they won’t even need weapons to inflict deeper wounds. We’ll devastate our own economy and dismantle our country from within. Yes, the terrorist attacks have hurt us economically. Hundreds of thousands of people, including individuals from 80 other countries, have been deeply affected by what happened on September 11. Some of us were fortunate enough to not lose a loved one, the breadwinner for the family, a place to work, or the place we call home. Those of us who are more fortunate need to remain strong so we can lend a hand to those who need it.

We have choices about our response to these terrorist acts. We can choose to be victims of this psychological warfare and live in constant panic mode, or we can choose to call on our own personal strength and power and rise above it.

The Power of Your Mind

You are stronger than your fear. Raise your thinking above the thoughts that weaken your resolve. Use this current situation as an opportunity to strengthen your greatest asset -- the ability to direct the course of your life by using the power of your mind. --Cheryl Richardson

We forfeit our freedom of choice through our own thought processes. There are very few things in life that leave us without choices. Yet some of us forfeit our choice to the point of seeing our options in life as more limited than they are. This generally leads to a feeling of hopelessness.

Fear and panic begin in your mind. If you listen to the daily news it’s easy to think fearful thoughts and imagine the worst possibilities. When our minds wander down this path, we begin to feel completely powerless. The more we fear, the more our minds generate negative thinking. And the more negative thoughts we have, the more we fear. It’s a vicious cycle that feeds on itself until eventually we are engulfed in fear, and panic sets in. So how do we break this cycle? Just as we treat anthrax exposure with antibiotics, so can we treat fear and panic. The prescription for this: be a gatekeeper for your mind and take control of your thoughts. Rather than focusing on what not to think about -- which gives those thoughts more power -- focus on what you choose to think about. Replace the negative with positive thoughts. Replace what if with positive possibilities in your life.

Here’s an acronym to help you remember the four steps to overcoming FEAR: · FOCUS: What is most important to you? What does the desired outcome look like? What steps are required to get you there? Focus on the positive. · EXPLORE: What are you resisting? What warning signals are present when you resist? What is the ultimate fear behind these warning signals? What's the worst thing that could happen? Even if the worst thing did happen, could you live with it? · ASSESS: What are your options? What action do you choose to take? What's next for you? What support can you get to help you move forward? · RESPOND: This is where the rubber meets the road - where you choose to say "yes" to the action you have chosen for yourself. If you are not ready to act, repeat this process until you are ready to move forward.

Take Care of Yourself

Like many others, I’ve found myself becoming consumed by the news and visual images on TV. About a week after the September 11th attacks I reached my saturation point. Since then I have limited the amount of time I spend listening to the news or reading the newspaper. I choose to be informed but not consumed. I’ve found some wonderful distractions by watching our amazing Seattle Mariners (my home baseball team) in the playoffs. I’ve found solace from fear and anxiety in reading a good book or calling a loved one. I’ve taken time to re-read some favorites stored in my e-mail humor folder. I've read spiritual and inspirational materials that keep me focused on the power of love and faith. And I read stories about human kindnesses that remind me just how many really good people there are in America and all around the globe.

We need to be physically, mentally, spiritually, socially, and economically strong so we can function at peak performance and be available to lend a hand to those who need it. Here are some ideas to help you practice self-care in each of these areas. Make a list of the ideas that appeal to you. · Physical health: Are you getting enough sleep? Are you eating regularly and choosing healthful foods? Are you getting enough exercise? · Mental health: Here are several ideas for strengthening your mental health: o Create a list of things you can do when fear and panic are setting in. Include enjoyable activities, forms of meditation and relaxation, uplifting people to contact, books you’d like to read, or music that calms or energizes you. o Start a Gratitude Journal. Begin or end each day by writing down at least three things that you are thankful for in your life. When you’re feeling discouraged, revisit your Gratitude Journal to remind yourself of all that is good in your life. o Keep a Worry Log -- -- a place to write down all of your worries and fears with a date next to each entry. Then you can check back monthly to see what percentage of your worries and fears actually came true. A Worry Log provides a great reality check for those consumed by fear. After doing this for a period of weeks or months, perhaps you will choose to spend less energy and thought on your worries and fears once you recognize that most of them never come true. · Spiritual health: What feeds your soul? What nurtures the essence of who you are? · Social health: Avoid people who drain you. Make plans to spend time with friends and family members who are uplifting and supportive. Avoid e-mail correspondence that drags you down. · Financial health: Find a balance between planning for the future and living in the moment. If you own a business, consider ways in which you can change with the times to be more responsive to your customers’ needs. If you work for someone else, consider your options in the event of pending layoffs or undesirable changes in the climate of your workplace.

Now that you’ve identified some ideas to help you be strong and healthy, reserve time in your schedule to make these things happen. Yes, that’s right! Make appointments with yourself so you have time reserved to do these things. Visit http://www.orgcoach.net/sixsteps.html to review a six-step planning process you can use to build these things into your weekly schedule.

If you need assistance building balance into your life or reassessing your personal or professional priorities, give me a call at 425-881-6627. The first no-obligation coaching call is free.

Extend a Hand to Someone Else

Grant that I may not so much seek To be consoled as to console; To be understood as to understand; To be loved as to love; For it is in giving that we receive, It is in pardoning that we are pardoned. --Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi

One of the clients I am coaching (I’ll call her Janet) has been living with a disabling disease for several years. For many months she has not been out of her home much at all and has had very little contact with people outside of her immediate family. During our last coaching call I asked Janet to tell me about her dreams for the future. She told me that once she got better she wanted to do something to help others living with disabilities; she wanted to visit them so they didn’t feel as isolated as she has felt over the last several years.

I asked Janet why she was waiting until she was well, and she indicated that it would be too difficult for her to get out and visit others in her condition. I asked Janet if she had trouble calling and talking with me for our coaching appointments, and she said that most of the time it was not difficult for her to do so. Then I asked what she thought about fulfilling her dream NOW by visiting with other homebound people by phone. She had never considered the possibility of anything but a face-to-face visit. The whole tone of her voice lit up as she began thinking of ways she could be of service to others in her present circumstances.

I share Janet’s story (with her permission) to illustrate a point: By helping others, we help ourselves. There’s something empowering about extending a hand to someone else in need for it is in giving that we receive. We all have a need to feel needed and of service to others.

If you are ready to move beyond fear and panic, I encourage you to find someone who needs a hand and extend yourself to them. You may not need to look far to find a place to be of service perhaps within your own family, neighborhood, place of worship, or in your workplace. And there are countless ways to volunteer through local non-profit organizations. You’ll be helping yourself in the process.

The US Constitution begins with the words "We, the people" -- that's who we are -- the people! And we will not be defeated.

For tips on how to enjoy a more meaningful holiday season, visit http://www.orgcoach.net/newsletter/Nov2000.html to read my article from last November, Preparing for the Holidays: Ho Ho Ho or Bah Humbug!

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Kathy Paauw, a certified Business/Personal Coach and Organizing/Productivity Consultant, specializes in helping busy executives, professionals, and entrepreneurs declutter their schedules, spaces and minds. Contact her at mailto:orgcoach@gte.net or visit her website at http://www.orgcoach.net and learn how you can Find ANYTHING in 5 Seconds --Guaranteed!