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No More Lonely Weekends!When you are faced with the prospect of yet another weekend alone, do you ever take the initiative to call someone you know and suggest a fun activity such as having coffee, or attending a movie?Or do you always take the passive approach and hope someone else will call you? If you spend your whole life waiting for the phone to ring, hoping that someone, somewhere, will call and invite you out to do something, you are giving up control of your social life to everyone else. Why should everyone else be in charge of your social life? Why not take control of at least part of it? You can create your own social events and invite other people to join you. You can ask others if they’d like to come and watch television with you. You can invite people over to your place for supper. You can even host a party in your home. If you don’t want to host an activity in your home, there are thousands of possibilities right outside your doorstep, limited only by your imagination. You can organize a picnic, an outing to the zoo, or a trip to the bowling alley. You can suggest a walk through the park, or a visit to a library or art gallery….A tennis match…..A tractor pull…..A concert…..A movie. It’s up to you. You can invite people you know well, and you can include others you have only recently met. You can even ask your friends to bring some of their other friends along. If you have never dreamed of initiating a social event on your own, is it because you are too shy? Do you fear rejection? Does the thought of initiating a social event seem terrifying to you? Is it just too different from the behavior you are used to? The more often you do it, the easier it will become. Your social occasions don’t need to be big and complicated. You can start very small, with just one or two people. You don’t need to plan a big, exciting event, and it doesn’t have to be perfect! If you are socially inexperienced, start off with events that are low key, but fun. Decide how many people would be the ideal number to invite. You might be most comfortable with just one other person, or you might prefer to invite six, or twenty. You decide. What’s the worst that might happen? Are you worried that someone might say, “I wouldn’t go to supper at your house if you were the last person on earth”? That’s about the worst answer you can expect. And it’s not really likely. You can make the likelihood of success higher by inviting people who already seem to like you. If anyone turns you down, don’t spend even one minute wondering why those people are not coming! Just concentrate on finding those people who would love to spend time with you. Never leave your entire weekend empty just in case somebody might call. This will contribute to your boredom, loneliness and depression. The more often you invite friends and acquaintances to share evening and weekend activities with you, the more likely they will reciprocate with invitations in return. They will even look to you for social leadership. The real winner here is you. If you learn to create your own social occasions, and invite others to enjoy them with you, never again will your social life be totally up to the whims of other people. You will be able to greatly multiply your social options. It feels good to be more in charge of your life! This article by Royane Real is taken from her new book on making friends. Sign up for her free newsletter filled with Life Improving tips! www.royanereal.com
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